"The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet." Aristotle

Okay so lately I've been feeling like school with never end......NEVER!!! I know that by this time next year I'll be in the home stretch. But right now I feel like I'm overwhelmed and just plain sick and tired of it all.

I've been doing school non-stop for the past....oh....6 years. Now granted in that time I've completed my AA, my BA and half of my MBA. I've put myself in in debt for this and right now I feel like I'm slipping. I guess that's normal at times when you've kept up the pace I've kept up for as long as I have but I'm running out of steam.

Oh well, maybe if I get a weekend in a few months it will make a difference. Here's hoping. Till then pressing on. What else is there to do right, it's not like it's in me to quit.

Black and Gold

Okay so in a stunning victory of 45-14 My New Orleans Saints have beaten the Cardinals and advanced to the next and final round of the play off's where they will meet the Vikings (who beat the Cowboys today) next weekend. For the second time that I remember the Saints are poised to go to the the Super Bowl. The last time they were defeated by the Bears. This time the Vikings stand in the way of the trip to Miami. I know that next weekend I will be on the edge of my seat as I watch Drew Brees attempt to lead the team I have loved and cheered for my whole life to their first super Bowl appearance.

I wish my Dad was alive to see it. Although a native of New York, he always watched the Saints, usually didn't have anything good to say about the number of games that were lost every year and how they didn't know how to play football. He always laughed at me when I was a kid putting aside my dolls to watch football. Never agreeing on the same teams, and never agreeing about the Saints.

Well this seems to be their year, and as I hope for victory next weekend and a trip to the Super Bowl, if we don't make it there is always next season. As most people from New Orleans, I was born a Saints fan, I'll die a Saints fan and it was never about the number of games won or lost but the heart of a team that is connected to the heart of a city that will always be home. Geaux Saints

It's effing cold and why do they keep saying "snow" and "Florida" in the same sentence

Hey so we're in the new year and lots of wonderful things are happening.....Um, ya I want to talk to the writers of this damn soap opera cause we need a better story line. If I was writing it, we wouldn't be too hot and wouldn't be too cold somewhere around 70ish would be good. I would have a mega hottie for a love interest that adored me and a bad boy on the side vying for my attention and I would be no bigger then a size 10. Oh and I forgot the amazing job that pays more then enough to pay all the bill and have money for random trips to NYC when I wanted. Yup ladies and gentlemen, that's my dream life.

Reality Check is that I'm really a 18 and shrinking (it's better then the 20 I was last year), there is no one except my friends and my spawn that adores me and no one vying for my attention, the job is okay and deals with the bills but there are no trips to NYC at random and right now it's fricking cold. At least we have heat at work again. The week of Christmas the heat went out at work, now I didn't think much of it since I was on vacation but damn it was cold the beginning of this week when I came back and there was still no heat. We got heat back yesterday. So tomorrow it's supposed to have a high of 30. I live in the middle of Florida and the high is supposed to be 30.......They said snow and Florida in the same sentence twice this week... I gotta tell you I'm good with just cold, I don't do snow unless I'm just visiting it. I live in Florida for a reason.

Well that is all the happening, oh and my next semester is starting on Monday......I have 6 more classes after this to finish my Master's. YIPPY!!!!!! Look for more "OMG" updates over the next 8 weeks as I enter a semester from hell.

Ciao for now Luvs.

Happy New Year

Welcome to the first day of the rest of your life.....Okay well the first day of 2010 anyway. So what is in store? Who knows really but it isn't what was past, that's done. Last night was awesome, good food, good friends and good times and good fireworks. Over all it was an amazing night. So with an amazing night like that to finish the year off it just goes to reason that we would have an amazing year.

I'm claiming that we will, I know that I am going to do what I can to make my year wonderful for myself and my spawn and well if anyone else wants along for the ride come on.

New Year's Eve

So today is the last day of 2009. I come upon this day with mixed emotion. I look at everything that has happened in the last year and it makes me sad. This time last year I was upset, one who gets dumped on New Year's Eve usually is. Now to be fair on the off chance that the Ex is actually reading my blog (as if) the official break-up (the words) weren't said until Jan 2nd. I never believed in the old wives tale that said what you were doing on New Year's Eve is what you will be doing for the rest of the year. Until this year that is, I was crying, heartbroken and shattered on New Year's Eve last year and that is pretty much how my year was. So with 2010 upon us I'm determined that I will not spend another year like that.

I was in love....something I'm not sure I can believe in anymore. I trusted, something I find I am unable to do. I have someone on the fringes of my life that is just there because that is where they need to be right now and honestly that is where I need them to be. Every now and then I think about what was lost and feel the pain that goes with it but mostly the anger at the events that took place and the way that they ended. It's always harder when they mean something to you and in the end you meant nothing at all. I work, I try to be the best mom I can be despite certain people telling me otherwise and trying to finish this damn degree.

I'm ready for whatever 2010 has to offer, weather it be a year for just me or if people on the fringes decide to step in. I do know one thing, I will not cry anymore, at least not over that. I read an article recently that said to get over it you had to get rid of everything, emails, texts, im's so tonight I did. And what do you know, tomorrow is another day.

Have a wonderful and safe New Year's Blessed Be.

Christmas time has come.....and gone.

Well, it's December 26th. YAY we made it. (Oh and Happy B-day to my Allie-D, she's amazing) We made past another Christmas!!! Okay I hate to say it like that but you know, since I had my spawn I look at this holiday a lot different then I did before. This year, like all other years my spawn got a case of the "I wannas" and the "Gimmies" These are two terminal illnesses that effect children of all ages. I even got a mild case of it myself on Christmas Day but at least it was for eatable things.

So back to what I was saying. Spawn and I had to go out on Christmas Eve for a last minute gift. I had neglected to get my roomie her gift and well, there it was. So there we were in the Books-A-Million in the mall after finding the book in question (she's going to make wonderful things from it) standing in line waiting to check out and every other word out of her mouth was "I want" or "Can you buy me" so I turned to her and uttered the words that cracked up the entire line. "You know this is Christmas Eve, I told you I'm not buying anything for you since Santa is coming tonight. Don't make me text or FaceBook him in the middle of his run to take back your presents." Yes guys I said it, I threatened to FaceBook Santa on my spawn. Bad thing is that Santa really has a FaceBook page where you can leave messages.  Welcome to the here and now when I can have Santa on FaceBook and friends of mine that will send text and pretend to be Santa for me. Good thing the spawn doesn't read my blog right.

So on Christmas Eve I got a surprise phone call from Vader......how special. First time in four months that I've heard from him. He ended up seeing the spawn today for the first time since the end of May. Christmas miracle or attack of guilt? Who knows, he's supposed to be leaving town again at the beginning of the month. I can't believe that I used to love someone so much only to dislike them so intensely now, but there really is a thin line between love and hate.

Speaking of love, I'm not in it anymore. YAY me I think. Bad thing is I'm not liking what is happening in the mean time. There is someone that I like on several levels, I'm attracted to but I don't think that I could ever fall in love with. I don't know that I could ever trust anyone enough again to fall in love. There is a part of me now that looks at people and wonders how much of what they say is a lie. I met someone several months ago, I personally think he's amazing. He makes me laugh and he makes me feel like me again. I just don't know where or what it means. I think I need to be friends first, really be friends, it it's going to be anything. We'll see, I do know one thing, damn he can kiss. :) Ya I know but sometimes you just gotta find out.

Here comes the new year in a week. I can't wait to see what is in store for me. I know for certain that it will be better then last year. I'm looking forward to it.

The Holidays

Okay so we have made it through Thanksgiving, battled our way through Black Friday and have dove headlong into the holiday season. I can't believe that this year has gone so fast and so much has changed in both my life and my spawn's.

It gives me pause some of the changes that have been forced upon us because a few of them were not good (at least in my opinion) and had I been asked about them prior they would have been handled differently. I miss the person I used to be. The one that saw the good in people instead of the bad right off. I'm trying to get to that place again.

So here we are again at Christmas, may this one be better then last year. At least I'll actually be where I'm wanted instead of the farce I endured last year. I will have my spawn with me this year and will be spending time with family and friends and have special plans for Christmas Eve. Better then last year already.

Time, it seems, not only heals but shines a really big spotlight on situations allowing you to see things for what they were not just what the emotions would let us remember them as. I would like to remember some great romance with the love of my life. What I got was a hard lesson, one I doubt I will ever forget. While I was in love and hopeful and trying to be not broken, he was never in love (well with me anyway) broken in his own ways, and emotional not involved in the relationship I mistakenly thought we had. If he ever stops working long enough and is honest enough with himself to fix what his own issues are then he stands a chance at being happy. I wish that for him. I really do hope that one day he stops being so careless with the people in his life.

Vader has also departed for parts unknown, I'm told he's not currently in the state but my information is a week old and could be wrong by this time. What isn't wrong is he hasn't seen our spawn since the end of May and I have spoken to him since Aug. I'm sincerely hoping that he doesn't just show up around Christmas and decide that he's taking her. That would be bad. Really bad, like having to call the cops bad.

After Christmas we'll deal with New Year's, Dear God please let this one be better then last year. Oh wait, I don't have a boyfriend to basically dump me on New Year's Eve so that right there will be better. 2010 will be a better year, I'm going to just claim it now. Things will get better, time will continue to heal and life will go on. That's the way it always goes and if it doesn't there is always cookies.

So here we go toward the first of the year. Who knows if I'm going to get to post again between now and here so a toast for the new year, May you live life to the fullest, love with all you have and laugh often.