Okay so as mentioned in the previous post, I did type a post in Nov and I really did think that I posted it. Um, yeah well that was about the time that all hell broke loose in mine and spawn's life so (shrugs) things happen.
Sometimes we look at things we go through and situations we're in and we mentally divorce ourselves from them. We're there but not really there. I had one of those hell bent, OMFG please tell me this is not happening in my life moments last month. As many of you that read this blog, and many of you that I read as well, know dealing with what we deal with on a daily basis with our children that have mental illness is in a word difficult. There is always the constant struggle to make sure that they are receiving the right services, the right care, the right everything. The keeping of ones temper when they are suddenly in a manic phase, the temper tantrums, the struggling to parent and get through to them when it seems like you can't reach them at all.
And I play both mom and dad. Thank god for my friends and my roomies that are wonderfully supportive, my boyfriend too. Coming into a situation like this is never easy, hell dating as a single parent is hard enough, when you add all this on top of it it's damn near impossible. But I digress, Okay here goes, Spawn had a bad med reaction and her first hospitalization, she was inpatient for almost a week. I think the hardest thing for me to come to grips with besides the fact that it was needed, was I work there. Her meds are more stable now and while things are not perfect, they are at least better.
As I mentioned in previous posts, I had to go to court last month as well due to Vader not paying his child support. Well to make a long story short, he didn't show up, reported that he lived and worked in the state and then requested a phone conference for the hearing because of working out of state. The hearing officer was less then pleased. So if he gets caught doing anything then he will be arrested and there is a $1000 purge or 60 days in jail. He's called a few times however I am still under advisement from her therapist not to respond due to her reaction the last time and the fact that she gets angry every time he's mentioned. I offer her the chance to return his call. So far she hasn't taken it. I'm sure you're wondering why I just don't try to talk to him about all this. Well, he doesn't think I'm worth talking to, so I don't think he's worth picking up the phone for.
In other news, the show I was in went wonderfully. B and I are still doing good, it will be two months soon. I'm enjoying it and I believe he is too. He is greatly supportive and I needed that right now. Work is still insane, but well, that is to be expected.
So in the mean time, I'm going to keep hoping that Spawn's meds work, hope that Vader pays even a little of the support, hell I'd take just enough to pay for her dance lessons for a month, or even a week of day care. Something, anything to help. Between the meds, the dr's and the therapy co-pays I am getting eaten alive. According to the court order he's supposed to pay half of the co-pays for any visits. I haven't even bothered to ask since he won't pay anything toward the monthly that is due, I know he wouldn't pay anything toward those.
Well onward to the holidays and I will not go so long in between posts.
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